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Blogmas 22 | The Power of the RIGHT Friends

Friends? How many of us have them? Ones we can depend on? Friends? Real friends require investment of time, energy and intentionality. I learned that there are over 7 billion people in the world and we all may have different definitions of what a friend is. I learned that certain words can mean different things to different people and many words need to be defined. Words such as friend, loyalty, being there and more. Sometimes draining a person and getting all you need is a true friend to one but to another healthy boundaries of what I do is also a friend. To one saying no is not being a good friend but to another saying no sometimes is being the best friend. I feel many friendships do not last because our definitions and expectations are different but not always expressed. So we have these ideas and never share them with the other person and then get mad when they don’t do what we want.

Until our definition of friendship is the same, we will continue to have unequally yoked friendships. According to the bible, a friend lays down his life for you (John 15:13). Jesus was the perfect picture of what a friend should be. A true friendship made in heaven is when they sharpen one another as iron sharpens iron (Proverbs 27:17). If you have friends in your life who are not helping you to grow or to become better, that is not a friend. A friend is supposed to edify you and lift you up. The bible says in Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. A friend helps you meet your goal and push you toward that goal. A friend lifts you up when you are falling. If you are ashamed to express your shortcomings to a person, that is not your friend nor someone you trust. Pride does not belong in friendship. Where there is no humility, there can be no friendship. A true friend can admit when they need help and when they are struggling.

The enemy wants you to believe that being alone is best but that is a trick of the enemy. He wants to isolate you because when you are alone you are much more vulnerable. When you are alone he has a greater chance of devouring you and no one will know. Even natural enemies and predators want to get you by yourself, isolation is a weapon of the enemy to leave you defeated with no one around to call on for help. He wants to get you to a place where no one hears your cries and can help rescue you. But the devil is a liar, I pray right now that God leads you to the right friends. He wants to attack your mind and give you all these thoughts about life, yourself and others. In this case, a friend is like a buffer. A buffer is also an intercessor. They stand in between you and the enemy and a friend helps you to fight.

Allstate understands this perfectly, they understand the power of being in the right hands. I have heard it said, I can tell where your life is headed by looking at your friends. Also in the words of my mother if you have 9 broke friends you will be the 10th. The bible says, bad company corrupts good morals (1 Corinthians 15:33). The bible has the perfect picture of friendship. The bible also has all the wisdom you need to know about how to be a good friend and how to discern if someone is a friend to you.

The power of being in the right hands is you have an accountability partner that walks with you through life. The right friends will pray for you and pray you through. I learned my lesson to never beg for friends. I have many genuine friends and they all have played intricate roles in my life. All my friends also have levels just as Jesus had. I have many friends but they all have different accesses to me. Jesus had 70, 12, 3 disciples. Some could see him totally transparent and the others walked with him. In this next season, understand…you must understand where each friend is supposed to be. Not every friend can handle you at your worst or in your nakedness. Also understand, that not every friend can handle the really intimate moments of your life and that is okay. Do not force people to be in roles that they cannot handle.

It is important to be in the right hands because of the mantle that is upon your life. You need friends like Johnathan and David, Johnathan protected David from his own father. You need friends, God does not want us to be alone. You need praying friends, interceding friends, believing friends, encouraging friends and many others. Even Jesus had to rebuke the devil out of Peter because Peter attempted to stop the plan of God. Anyone who hinders God’s perfect will is an enemy. But most of all you need friends that will correct you. If you have friends that are afraid to correct you or rebuke you, they are not a friend. If your “friend” lets you walk around in error, they are not a friend but a yes man. A person like that is only with you for what you can do for them, they do not want you to be better. If there is a person in your life that is afraid to speak up, that is a sure sign they do not trust you with what they have to say. That is also a sign that there is a disconnect and the relationship is not what you think it is.

In this next season, I want you and me to be in the right hands. I want you to have relationships where you can call on a person and they will not walk away from you because of your shortcomings or mistakes. In the words of TD Jakes if they can leave you easily, they were never assigned to your destiny. If they can leave you, they are showing you that in the worst of times they would not be able to sustain you or lift you up. They showed you that they are not the right hands. If you are in the wrong hands, they have the ability of leading you toward destruction. The wrong hands are those who allow you to do wrong and they either participate with you or leave you to your own troubles. A real friend helps you draw nigh to God. If they are not drawing you to God, that is a relationship that needs to be severed. Get into the right hands immediately. One thing for sure, two for certain; in order to be in the right hands, you have to be the right hands yourself. You cannot expect from people what you aren’t able and willing to be to them. Whatever you sow, you will also reap.

The friends I had before Christ, encouraged my drinking, smoking and lustful behaviors. God separated me from them and then he gave me his choice friends. These friends inspired my walk with God. From being with them, I wanted more of God. The encouraged my purity in a way I didn’t perceive possible. The right friends ushered me into purpose when the wrong friends worked subconsciously with the enemy to lead me astray. In the next season, know the difference.

The right hands never judge...

Levels of Friendships: Know where each friend stands

  1. Root, branches, leaves

  2. Disciples: 3, 12, 70

A friend of real friends,

Te’Aire Griffin, Founder/Visionary Restore Mon

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